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Pimping Your Best Friend


When I think of the term “pimp,” I usually think tacky snake skin shoes and bright yellow suits, lime candy Cadillacs, cheesy hats and bad 80’s fashion.  But today’s pimp is somebody a little bit more incognito.  Somebody who blends in.  Somebody a little bit closer.  Somebody like youre best friend.

The other night I was headed into town to meet a girlfriend late for some drinks.  I called and she told me to meet her at Hush.  I told her I was with a friend, and asked if there was a door cover.  Immediately she asked… “is it a guy?”  What does it matter if it’s a guy?  This is immediately the response most girls ask when you meet up with them.  I happen to be dating this guy and even if he wasn’t there, I wasn’t going to submit to being the “bait” and eye candy to whoever her male company was.  I’m not a geisha, or a call girl, or someone you can just summon to flirt with your male company. I had a social itch, planned to meet my girlfriend for some cocktails, didn’t mind the male company, and I hoped to have a meaningful intellectual conversation with someone.  I usually will go out with a guy friend, regardless if he is a date, or just a really good friend.  I think if you want to talk to me you gotta break down some walls, and if I let some down, maybe you’ll get my number. 😉 I’m a woman with respect for myself.  When I’m out, I’m a woman with class, so if you can’t handle that then hang with the little girls. 

(hey home girl, if you read this, I’m not mad or anything, it was just an epiphany I had at the moment.  I had a great time with your friends and they are super cool!)

Ladies stop pimping your friends!  I thought I left that shit behind in Vegas.

The One That Got Away.


What would you do? Be the other woman? You’re an unconventional thinker. Secure with yourself and confident. This is not a desperate attempt of an insecure individual. The guy still loves you. He cheats on her with other girls, but it’s different  if he cheats on her with you. He feels guilty, because it’s not cheating unless you read poetry. And the 2 of you definitely read poetry together. Would you stare at a life on better legs and let it slide?

She’s 10 years older than him. She’s 40! Sure she’s safe. But he doesn’t love her like he loves you. He’s himself around you. Around her, he is always putting on a front. Do guys want the bad girl who you can always be open with, or the good girl you have to always lie to.  He wants to live a lie?

He still sends you those naughty iPhone pics.  And your timing is often wrong, but whenever you are coincidentally in town at the same time, which is rare, u spend the weekend together. You sit there quietly while he talks to the other woman on the phone.  You really want to giggle, or bust him with his girlfriend, but you don’t.  You ARE the other woman.

In your eyes he was perfect.  But as time went by, you realized those special places he took you to like Halekulani and your stomping grounds, Nobu, aren’t really special.  He takes her there too.   Are you a victim of a womanizer?

A week goes by and you are devastated and you miss him.  A year goes by and you are over it. Then the next time u fling with him, the vicious cycle begins all over again. You miss him again and are reminded that they are your one true love. That you wont stop loving them till the planets stop turning.  You could attempt what would appear to be a desperate attempt to win him back.  Or you can play it off and pretend it doesn’t matter, but suffer inside because you’d only be lying to yourself.  But you’re the other woman.  What would you do?

She thinks you’re a monster.  But you are just a victim of love.

xoxo

Kristie

Wednesday Night Adventures


So I decided that I was going to work early @ Rick’s and leave late, so I can try to leave with a g.  I made $300 off of a customer which turned out to be vice.  While sitting with him in the VIP lounge, he flashed me his badge.  I was afraid, perhaps I did something wrong, that I was going to jail, and my heart stopped.  Then he showed me his VICE card too.  He told me that he is just human, and wants to have fun, and apart from work, wants to take me out.  So I said OK.  We clicked, and he gave me his number.   I usually wouldn’t do that, but hey, I’m single, and I’m not doing anything, so I said sure, we can go gambling next week at the Bellagio or grab some dinner.

So, I was in the back locker room telling some of the girls my scary encounter with VICE.  Perhaps, more were out there still.  One of the girls got sassy with me.

“Firemen have badges.  It could’ve been anyone.”  I continued to explain to her that I saw his VICE card.  “Oh, you can actually see his badge in the dark?” she cockily replied.

“Yeah, you know, before you hit a certain age, your eyes still work pretty well in the dark.”  She flipped out.  I’m pretty calm when people whom I don’t give a shit about have something stupid to say.   She went off calling me stupid, fat, ugly, and that I’m the new girl that nobody likes.  That I walk around talking shit about all the other girls… yadi yadi yada…

“Hmmmm… Perhaps she can hear my conversations over all that loud music.  Or maybe she can read my mind.”  I am thinking and laughing to myself.  I know for a fact that I don’t sit around and hate on other girls.  I’m confident with myself, and only girls that are insecure with themselves have to bring down other girls to make themselves feel better.  In fact, when I met her and her friend, I told them how beautiful they are.  So where does she get off saying that I talk shit?  That’s just not me.  I try to see the positive in everyone.

“Perhaps nobody likes me because they’re jealous,” I think to myself  , but don’t say, because that’s how strippers are.  Insecure and jealous.  They don’t know how to come together and get along and they can’t stand competition.

“Fat?”  Hmmmm…  I’m a size 0.  I have an intense routine.  That’s some funny shit, I think to myself!

So while she is screaming at the top of her lungs at me, security walks in, and I am laughing while I eat some chicken soup.  We get sent home for the night.  Totally bummed I didn’t leave with a G.  It was slow for everyone, which is why I’m sure they were hating, I just spent the last 45 minutes in the VIP room.

So I decide to go meet a friend at Blue Martini.  I’ve known this guy off of Facebook for a year now, but have never really met.  I head out to Blue Martini and tell him to meet me by the restrooms.  While I’m trying to get in the restroom 3 intoxicated girls are arguing in front of the door, one of them clutching onto the door handle for balance.  I say excuse me, repeating 3x and getting louder.  When they ignore me, and I see that they are drunk, I finally grab the door handle and open the door over them, pushing them out of the way.  They started screaming at me profanities.  I’m seriously not in the mood at this point.  I don’t want to get fired from Rick’s, but Blue Martini, I can care less if I’m kicked out of there.  However, I had to pee really, really bad, so I ignored them and ran into the stall.

So when I meet my friend that I have never met, he is intoxicated and a little dopey.  So I decide to go home.  He figures that he is going to walk me to my car.  I told him no, that won’t be necessary, but he decides to anyways.  So I tell him that he can walk me 10 feet to my car.  When we get to the parking lot, I tell him goodnight, but he doesn’t listen and insists on walking me to my car.  I’m straight up, so I tell him that my car is dirty, and there’s lots of junk in it, and it’s embarrassing.  He doesn’t listen, so I literally run away and hide behind an Escalade, while I watch him sneak off from under the car, I sneak across the parking lot to my car.

When I get home there’s a drunk guy standing in front of my car critiquing my parking.  Supposedly I took a long time to park.  I was sitting in my car for a minute on my phone.  I have these crazy young new neighbors who get drunk every night.  It was annoying.  Then when I got inside the house, he was standing outside my window for a whole hour.  It was creepy.

What a fucking crazy night!

I’m over clubs, people with anger issues, who can’t handle their alcohol and don’t know their limits.

Speaking of drunks, here are some funny pictures of drunk people.

Drink Responsibly

xoxo

Kristie Manning

I kiss with my eyes open.


“She closes her eyes when she kisses me.”

The obvious assumption would be that opened eyes during a kiss would be uncomfortable. I tend to think that there must be more to it than that.

What do you think?

Closing you eyes is a reflex to things getting close to thier eyes. Everyone closes them at least briefly. There really is no significance to reopening their eyes. Most do not because it uncomfortable to look at anything that close and focus will be off. If you look at your own hand starting close as if you notice its out of focus till you move a few inches away. Its not fun to have blurry vision.

I keep my eyes open sometimes because it’s nice to see what you are kissing.  Sometimes it can be awkward if they are a bad kisser and are making a funny face.  But is there a significance  between kissing with your eyes open or closed?  Is an open eyed kiss not meaningful for the one with their eyes opened?  Is the kisser with their eyes closed more in love? I demonstrate to mock the lovely Stacey by keeping my eyes open.   But is there a psychological reasoning behind closed and opened eyes?

xoxo

Kristie Manning

Have you ever had your ass kicked?


Yeah.  My baby sister was having problems with her friends at school, so I had to go down there and regulate and tell them to knock it off… or else. LOL!

We fought 3 times.  One time we were in the field at a football game because I was friend with one of her friends, and they all decided to jump me.  They thought they were some gangsta’s or something and if I wanted to hang with them I had to get jumped.  One of the girl’s was really nice, I don’t know why she did it.  But then Jake Merill, the sweet heart, was friends with my sister, and he helped me.  I was on the ground holding my stomach and my blocking my head and they all were taking turns kicking me.  He saved me that time.  I limped off into the dark field.

So later now that Tonica knows me she doesn’t like me.  I don’t even know why.  It was really for no reason.  She was a year older than me, and about 8″  taller and 40 lbs bigger than me.  I didn’t even really know her.  She happened to be one of the girl’s big sister whom my little sister didn’t like, and she came to regulate me.  I’m a brave person and don’t run away from fights.  All the girl’s are scared of Tonica, she’s a pretty big girl.  So at least I got props for not running away or crying.  I took my beating.  She mounted me, and punched me one time in the eye.  I had a nasty black eye.  She got me good this time.

The last time we fought we were at a football game.  I had my bike, so I jumped off of it.  Upset about the other times we fought, my black eye, and feeling outnumbered, she was alone.  I punched her in the face.  I was pissed. Then she pushed me and I fell over my bike and it was over because there was a cop right there.

Funny thing after all these years, I find her on FB, and she apologizes.  Kids do stupid things.  It’s funny how we grow up and grow out of things.

Top 10 Bad GIrl Club Fights

Funny as hell girl fight compilation

Girl beats up guy (in the ring)

This cage fight, this girl has this guy running away, she even kicks him to the face and he drops.

This one is CrrAAAZZZY

I love a good girl fight.  One time I was at Blush in the bathroom and they had a fight with me in the middle and dropped their drinks all over me.  LOL

Or here’s another story about a girl who I gave cracks to.  LOL!  I was in the bathroom at Club 939 in Honolulu and some drunk girls wiped her hands on me.  I was like wtf!  And started complaining to my friend, a waitress working there.  Just then the girl’s friend’s come out of the stall and try to justify it, she’s drunk kay.  Well then apologize, don’t get it my damn face about her being a stupid drunk!  Dumb local girls.

So later on in the night, my good friend Chucky was nice and offered to share his booth with them, since it was only him and another friend.  Chucky’s my really good friend so I came by to say hi.  Stunned they were sitting there, I told him the story about what happened earlier in the restroom.  I ignored it, because she was just drunk, and working there I deal with drunk people.  But her friend, the taller, loud mouth Hawaiian had to say something and bring it up.

I told her get the fuck away before I have her thrown out.  Drunk she started to get in my face and I laughed.  Why is she getting in my face when she should be apologizing for her friend.  I told her get out of my face, before I beat your ass, and then have you thrown out.  By then they’re making a scene and get thrown out.  Their guy friend during all this is getting arrested too for getting in a fight.  I guess the girl is friend’s with one of the bouncers, so he asks me, if she is cool can they come back in.  And I’m like yeah, I don’t care, she’s starting shit, I’m just trying to work.

So the whole night goes on by with no drama, and I go back to talk to my friend Chucky the last 5 minute before closing.  This time a shorter girl comes up to me… and this is how it goes.

“So you worked here long time?”

“Yeah since we re-opened, I’m one of the original girls.”

“Oh yeah, I”ve never seen you here before.”

“That’s because I’ve worked at FEmmes and Rockza, and I go to Vegas a lot.”

“Oh yeah, where do you work in Vegas?”  I was getting irritated with the 20 question’s and was wondering were this was going.  Shortly, I answered . . .

“Spearmint Rhino.”

“Oh! Do they act like mousy fucking bitches up there too?”

Laughing, I stood up, told her. . .

“Here, hold my beer.”  I passed her my Heineken, took off my 9 inch stilettos, and I pounded her face to a bloody pulp with my shoes.  The taller girl at this point jumped in and pulled my hair.  I continued to swing at both of them with my shoes,   and I flipped the other girl over me to get her away.  But she had her fingers in my hair so I fell back and rolled onto the table that had about 50 shots on top of it.  The security held me back and the girl kept yanking my hair.

I yelled at Angus for holding me back because nobody held her back and that left me vulnerable to hits.  He was holding the wrong person back.  Or maybe he did it on purpose.  Who knows?  Luckily she was stuck in my hair.  Her friends’ face was all gashed up, and she had a shiner on her cheek bone and her fore head with small cuts.  I was good, I just had a bad headache from getting hair ripped out, and went to the bar and had a shot of patron while they threw them out screaming. LOL!

xoxo

Kristie Manning

xoxo

Kristie Manning